This summer has been about overcoming various fears of mine. So I decided to start off by tackling approach anxiety with women. I do this rather simply. Every time I go out to a bar I ask at least one girl on a date. Granted, I'm not expecting to meet a serious romance this way, but I figured what better way to conquer a fear than to confront it directly.
About a month ago I went to a bar with a friend of mine and my eyes beheld quite an attractive lady in the distance. I was a little bit to much of a pansy to just walk right up to her and say hello. So I took far to long to scope out the situation. We made eye contact several times and blatantly checked eachother out, yet for me that still wasn't enough. I waited too long. She was leaving with her friends.
BUT NO!!! Knowing that if I didn't complete my mission I would feel like a complete failure I decided to charge. She is leaving with her friend, I RUN after her and finally catch up to her as she is just outside the door. I say, "Excuse me, I noticed we were making eye contact throughout the night and a good bit of it was rather sexy so I thought I'd come up and say hello!....... And, I think we should get some salad."
So she and her friend are giggling the whole time this is happening, so I obviously did something right, and besides the awkward approach I was pretty pleased.
Her response: blah blah blah, Boyfriend, blah blah, cute, blah.
I didn't really even listen I was SO HAPPY OF MYSELF!
I marched around the bar for a while dancing and giggling to myself, elated, overjoyed that I had taken a step in the right direction. If you know me you'll find it as no surprise that when I ordered my next drink I immediately shared my triumph with the bartender. "I'm so happy, she said no! I don't care!!"
So Many of the girls sitting around where I was at the bar over heard this and began to giggle. And little did I know, apparently this is charming behavior? Four or Five girls came up to me after this moment to tell me how it was cool that I just went up to talk to that girl and that I was brave.
WLASKKHF! WHAT?! I felt like an idiot. Of course! I was owning myself, Confidence. It's a shame that understanding something in principle is not the same as understanding it in practice, but at least its never to late to learn!
About a month ago I went to a bar with a friend of mine and my eyes beheld quite an attractive lady in the distance. I was a little bit to much of a pansy to just walk right up to her and say hello. So I took far to long to scope out the situation. We made eye contact several times and blatantly checked eachother out, yet for me that still wasn't enough. I waited too long. She was leaving with her friends.
BUT NO!!! Knowing that if I didn't complete my mission I would feel like a complete failure I decided to charge. She is leaving with her friend, I RUN after her and finally catch up to her as she is just outside the door. I say, "Excuse me, I noticed we were making eye contact throughout the night and a good bit of it was rather sexy so I thought I'd come up and say hello!....... And, I think we should get some salad."
So she and her friend are giggling the whole time this is happening, so I obviously did something right, and besides the awkward approach I was pretty pleased.
Her response: blah blah blah, Boyfriend, blah blah, cute, blah.
I didn't really even listen I was SO HAPPY OF MYSELF!
I marched around the bar for a while dancing and giggling to myself, elated, overjoyed that I had taken a step in the right direction. If you know me you'll find it as no surprise that when I ordered my next drink I immediately shared my triumph with the bartender. "I'm so happy, she said no! I don't care!!"
So Many of the girls sitting around where I was at the bar over heard this and began to giggle. And little did I know, apparently this is charming behavior? Four or Five girls came up to me after this moment to tell me how it was cool that I just went up to talk to that girl and that I was brave.
WLASKKHF! WHAT?! I felt like an idiot. Of course! I was owning myself, Confidence. It's a shame that understanding something in principle is not the same as understanding it in practice, but at least its never to late to learn!
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